I needed a new wallet....& leaving on a Jet Plane!

I needed a new wallet....
Originally uploaded by florspace.

Loads of stuff happening these days and I always wanna blog about it but end up crawling into bed. Maybe I'm getting old. DH says I work too hard. Strangely I don't feel it, even though I single-handedly made a couple of hundreds of purses, I still feel I could do more. Its bad enough I don't feel the same about my second degree. My first one made me realise what I really wanted to do in life, my second one came along and messed everything up. The latter also made me realise that there are some things that we simply can't have in life and that the evil guy is dangling the carrot (read: passport) to moving out of this dump. Unfortunately, I'm calling it 60% dump again, yeap, gone up, because recently as I am preparing for my second wave of the Private Reserve Collection, I realised I was working in a sweatshop, quite literally. I was standing and cutting fabrics when beads of sweat simply fall from my face. It felt nothing less than being in a sauna. I was breathing fire though I wasn't fuming. So thats it. Thats why I could eat buckets of ice-cream and bars of chocolate (from my dear swap partners!) and not get any fatter! I was sweating it out during the day. Only bad thing is I end up having to have a good shower every evening coz I stink like hell, oh wait, like the dumpster (Lorong Halus, Singapore's renowned dump). Ewwww.

That said, yes I have finally applied for the second degree on wednesday morning. Yeap, I'm dropping from ACCA coz its driving me up the wall for 2 years now with no conclusion. It was a tough decision to make & its sad to give it up but I can't go on wasting more time and money (esp!). I hate myself for saying this but I'm not getting any younger. Hence the big switcheroo.

Oh and I was at the PO the other day and realised not all people here are bad. One guy, very cute guy, opened the door to the PO for me, which almost never happens, the usual lady at the parcels counter was really nice and smiley and my bus came on time. It was quite a nice day. I noticed that my buses always made me wait 15mins or more unless I'm with someone. Somehow being alone's jinxed. Having a person around makes things luckier. Or maybe its just me. Oh well.

I am hoping that DH doesn't read my blog. Its official. I'm visiting him at the end of April til the end of June, 2 months in la la land. 30th April 2007 is our 10th year anniversary of being together. Last year I couldn't be there so I send him a box of columbian reds with chocolates and he still has them at his desk even though all the fengshui people in the world preach that dead stuff are better thrown out. :P I guess I can't afford to send Columbian blacks (he loves black-everything) so I'm going to show up at his door in black! Not naked, lewders! LOL DH, if you're reading this, act surprised. :P

SO SO SO, you peeps have only 1 MONTH more to grab cute & fabulous purses from my shop and thereafter, I'll be gone for 2 months! I might bring existing stock from my shop to Sydney so if you're grabbing anything, I'll be mailing from Sydney but shipping would be significantly higher. I hate it too. :+(

p/s: I made that wallet coz I needed a risk-free-guaranteed-happy-change in my life. If you feel you need such a cute change too, feel free to mail me. ;+)

Review

How time flies. Its been an interesting week. Its amazing how bad swaps and good swaps can affect one's mood. Stefanie's came and it really really lifted my mood. She sent me everything I totally need and want. The chocolates & tartlets are so good...

Then, there's always the real life part. I spend so much time online, its like I'm living 2 lives. The real one isn't nice. I'm close to the deadline of the application of my second degree, something I won't like to do but have to, in aid of migration later. I bet you've all at some point or other, hear about how I dislike this place. Yes, I've switched from pure hatred to a more endearing dislike. Perhaps someday I'll learn to love. LOL

I'm currently in the middle of a course I plain dislike. Its too much of a challenge I can't afford the time for. The lecturers speak in Singlish which irks me to no end, my classmates are mostly Chinese nationals here for more play than work. Most of my friends are working in real jobs and I hardly see them. Maybe its more rewarding to stay home, bolt the door, tune in to chillout music, eat my strawberries and administrate my little shoppe. Anti-social? Yes. Stupid? I don't think so. The thing is, everytime I leave the house, I leave myself open to random attacks by people. Bad manners, selfishness, violence, frowners, you name it. It leaves me nothing to hope for but to quickly run home and take cover. Just Saturday, I agreed to leave the house and go visit some travel fair at the convention centre. Boy, did I regret. I don't know about you guys, but I'm sensory defensive (sensory malfunction, not a psychological problem!) and get very irritated at slight uncessary and sudden contact with my skin. All my sensors will run to that spot and I won't be able to think of anything else for 5 minutes, except to slap, rub or scratch that spot. Why did I have to be born in Singapore? Navigating my way through the mall was like trying to get through a massive crowd counting down for Christmas at Times Square or something. The people all behave like they own the paths. No offence but strollers and families piss me off a lot. The ones here will spread themselves out, walking slowly enjoying the stroll oblivious to the mass of people behind trying to get through. I used to be polite and nice. Now I just plain push. Its no use bring nice anymore. Nice doesn't cut it in a selfish and cosmopolitain city like this one. Suffice to say I'll much prefer to stay in with my 2 metres radius of comfort zone for free play. I hear the government is desperately trying to increase the population by another million. *Shudder* I plan to get out of here before that happens. I lament too much.

There it is! Launch of summer totes at my website! Cheap and chic totes I couldn't help picking up to share. Very limited numbers and at only $5 each! Go grab some! ;+)

I've been procrastinating these for too long. Sometimes it just takes time, photo shooting, editing, uploading, concentration, efforts, mood, the works. Glad I spent sunday doing work! I fell asleep on the couch after dinner and woke to I, Robot on TV. I think I'm fully depreciated now and I'll go rest.

Helluva start to week

So, I found copies of my mini zippereds on etsy and I've received both nice and reality checks feedback from you people. I don't feel bad about the reality checks comments even though they do hurt initially, I do recognize facts so instead of sitting and whining, I'm going to focus on the good sides, like what Jill said, I sold a lot and am thankful esp when Martina convo-ed me on etsy telling me my stuff looks better than others even though they may use similar fabrics. She bought 3 minis from me that very day! So so so...instead of wrecking myself with negative thoughts (which I'm used to doing for most of my childhood), I'm going to continue creating more fabulous things for you people who love my stuff!

Very soon, I'll be launching a "Private Reserve Collection", already seen as a section at my etsy shop, containing all the most fabulous fabrics I have in my collection. Full of the cutest and most coveted Japanese imports! :+) Still at affordable prices, I promise. Not revealing too much yet so keep your eyes peeled!

I'm still struggling with my very naughty throat who still refuses to behave, annoying me every 5 minutes, causing my head to go into convulsions and hurt. :+( Custom orders will still be worked on so not to worry, they are coming. Doctor's medicine didn't help. Big sighs.

I'm also having a bad swap week, receiving not-so-nice things and people not bothering to say thanks for my package. I guess I shouldn't say too much but I do appreciate enormously people who read my preferences and send things put together with an effort. Or maybe that was already effort to them. Oh well, at least I got something. I know I'm picky but at least I am proud to say I make efforts to send people things they want and thank people when they send me stuff. I think I'll be more careful with my swaps in future.

I'm still not figured out in my course thing. Its mighty confusing, mind boggling and thoroughly boring. I would choose to do a BA in Fine Arts if I had the choice. My Financial Management & Control lecturer says we should sleep 4 hours in order not to "waste" our lives away. I can't decide if he's being smart or plain crazy. I do agree its his choice, his life to do a lot before he turns to dust. But unfortunately, I don't function well with 4 hours. I prefer to have more functional hours than a lot of half-ass work in my day. Besides, the best things happen when I sleep. Dream, rest and egyption cotton sheets. I won't regret even if I was to be dead because I did what I really want to do. Since when did you let your heart lead you?

It may be a geographical location thing, but its my personal opinion that people here could learn how not to shove their own ideas of life and personal preferences down others' throats. We are different. Can't stress that enough. "You should do this to get this", "do this and you will get this result" etc. Don't wanna hear that anymore. My life is the way it is because I like it. I like working through the night and sleeping in the day. I hate corporate high flyers and corner offices because I've been there and I wasn't happy. Even though my office was on a high tower with spectacular views and beautiful surrounds, I never had time to appreciate anything. Because I was working, just plain working. When I had money, I spent more, waiting for my next paycheck became a painful routine. At the end of the day, the fact that I could be replaced simply allude to the fact that I wasn't working for anything, not for myself, but for an organisation that I felt nothing for. I had to ask myself that painful question that when I'm on my deathbed, could I go knowing I had done what I wanted to or did I wait and waited and never got the chance to do what I actually wanted to? Parents here would tell their kids, study hard and you'll get a good job, good pay and that usually equates to good life. But they never did realise that this path is never the only one, nor is it the right formula for everyone. They would tell us, you can do what you want when you have money. Yes, corporate high flying pays well but do we really have the time to do what we want outside of the job? People here work 12-14 hours on a standard basis. I want no part of that unfortunately. My life is not about spending my days in a box working for something I don't care for. I'd much prefer to bake cookies and make stuff for people who appreciates them. To me, its much more meaningful to actually make someone's life better than to be rich and never have enough of time and money to actually be happy.

But that's just me.

Japanese Collection + sick (again...*yawn*)

I'm feeling a little wonky tonight, coz I'm sick, yes, again. Throat infection from Thursday, fever Friday, Doc on Saturday, blah blah blah. I'm basically coughing my lungs out right now and each time I do that, my head goes banging and blacks out for seconds. I knew something was wrong on Thursday coz I didn't eat much, felt cold and my head was burning in the night. I didn't have a good night and I knew I was in a lot of trouble coz I have classes on friday. Nonetheless, I survived on painkillers and wrestled through 8 hours of classes on Friday and stumbled home at 11. I woke with a really bad throat, so swollen and hurt, I couldn't talk. Mum dragged me to the Doc's. I got some medication which gave me some rashes by now, warranting another trip to the Doc's tomorrow. :P Anyways, regardless of the Doc's orders to rest, I made my usual mail trip to the PO as scheduled, mailed stuff and collected my only salvage of the day - cute fabrics. I spent all Sunday sewing again, oblivious to the fact that I'm sick. I think I can't sit around, or I'll feel sicker than I need. It'll be so much more productive to be active. Not to mention the amount of work waiting. Maybe this is it. The job I won't feel repulsive to wake to on Monday morning and the job I'll continue pouring my heart and soul into even when I'm sick. Medication made me a tad weak-ish but, "meh!".

I got some big orders after launching my Japanese Collection. I had those fabrics for a couple of months before really bringing them out. I'm such a hogger and I know if I don't at least use a bit of them, I'll have to rent a warehouse soon right before the folks kick me out! Anyways, I love them and really enjoyed making them though I had them scheduled to launch in January but you know, DH was here and he'll be so mad at me if I didn't spend time with him before he goes back to Sydney. So now he's gone, I'm back to sewing up a storm, listing everyday and stuff. I'm also secretly planning to pull out a bit of my neo-japanese fabrics for minis. So look out for them.

Painful things to note - I wonder if its ethical to be using another's product names? I ran a search on etsy and realised people have been using "Mini Zippered" to sell their pouches. Before I started selling them on etsy, no one really put both these words together for the description of their pouches. I'm thoroughly hurt and annoyed. Its horrible to me since I was the one who came up with the name and the idea to make these pouches only with fabulous materials. I didn't go on etsy and observe popular products before merely copying my own. I took time to think, design and experiment before I dared to sell them. Though I recognize that copies are inevitable in current markets, I feel horrendous when it happens on etsy, a place for indie designers and originals. I don't deny the idea of a zippered pouch is that avant garde but do people have to even stoop so low to steal a name? I wish they were nicer which is why I totally support people who make real originals. :+)

Anyways, for people who have been supporting me so much, HUGE thanks & warm hugs! You know I love you guys and will continue to create the best because I know you deserve it. ^___^

Midnight snack and hedgehogs

Midnight snack is diet suicide. Blame DH for the tea from Sentosa and the yum-cookies from Joseph! I had a long day. Make that very long. I managed to rush-pack everything this morning and mailed them all. Then I rushed to school. Then begin the long lessons and dreary warnings of looming exams and stuff. I have trouble understanding the lecturers; they use Singlish. Yes, I'm still appalled. Its a professional exam for god's sake. Do they have to stoop so low? Never mind all that, I failed my exams, mainly because I have trouble with their explanations. Using a mix of Singlish, mandarin, dialects, malay and god-knows-what isn't doing me any good at all. I'm motivated by intelligence and wisdom, not exam-oriented bozos. I'm beginning to think this isn't a good idea at all. My CPA-clad cousin told me, the course is more for working people, in the industry who have had the experience and are looking to move up. Well, I've been working here but somehow it seems that everything's not working out coz the language is bad. Its indeed easy to just blame something but I really do need someone who knows what he's talking about, not just scoring the question and passing the papers. I hate that. Its an oxymoron.

So I ended up at Starbucks after the lesson, hoping to read the class notes myself to see if I could figure some things out for myself. No such luck. Even the notes are like strings of estranged information that doesn't link up. I remember telling myself, "you're in so much trouble". My mind started to wander furiously by itself like a hungry dog on a leash chasing sausages. I thought of box purses, coasters, aprons, tea mats. It was just running away! I had to jerk it back to my notes several times. The sun started to set and I was left in the mood of low lights and jazzy tunes. I gave up. couldn't fight it no more. I sipped my grande latte and flip thru Home & Decor and miraculously my mind stopped giving me headaches. I remembered experiencing the mind-wandering process during my school days but it was never as furious as this time. I was the most comfortable in English, Literature and Art classes. I scored like hell because my mind never wandered. In fact, all the wandering it did was to go deeper into the subject at that time. I don't know how long can I really hide this. I don't want to disappoint my parents by venturing into the unknown but I'm facing trouble on the straightroad. Crossing my fingers and hoping to pass my papers probably isn't enough. I need help motivating myself really bad.

On the other side, My newest tote + mini! My favourite little animal - the hedgehog surrounded by squirrels and mushrooms! Coupled with pink dot grosgrain ribbon and chocolate canvas, this makes one irresistible combination! Its pink gingham inside with a pocket! Mini comes with the same choco canvas behind and ivory inside. Cute pink satin ribbon tie on the zip! ;+)

Go here!

Surprises are so nice....

I was working hard at my machine today when the door came a-knocking. A package came with no return address. The smoke from the postman was annoying but a surprise package! I wreck my brains for recent purchases. None. And this one seems to be mailed locally. My trusy blade opened the box and I was so surprised and happy to find that its from Joseph! We were supposed to do a collaboration project which I sent him some fabrics for. The note on the very cute box of cookies said he was in Japan and couldn't work on it. You shouldn't have Joseph! Though I'm a huge fan of Japan-anything and with memories of the delectable cookies from Osaka-Universal Studios, I know this one's gonna be just as great! I love the cute tin box too! I was actually going to buy a vintage tin robot and seeing a cute print of it on the box just totally clicked! LOL I was delirious coz I'd always had the impression that anything this fab has to be bought myself and missing a trip myself to Japan this year is heart-breaking.
Anyways, its Yum City. Population: ME!

Yup, socks. From my fav Muji Store in my suburb. They were closing, though these socks weren't on sale. I realised it only after I grabbed them and skipped over to the counter. They were too cute and soft to miss. I think I had a long day. They seem to scream comfort to me at that time. I'm going to miss them. Now I'd have to make a longer trip to the city for Muji.

Beads and Button Matchbox fill swap on swapbot. I'm joining a ton of swap over there coz some of them are really meaningful to me. This one's too cute to miss. Its my first matchbox swap and its going to Ella. Hope she likes it. Loads of beads & buttons. Mostly pink, as usual!

Its been raining rather heavily these 2 days. I'm going to the PO tomorrow. Have to send DH's Hinamatsuri package too. Its a girl's day thing but I couldn't not send him those goodies I found from the supermarket. They were flown in for the event, pink and cute! I'm not taking a picture coz its a surprise. ;+) Off to read for now. Classes start tomorrow + more enquiries for other degree. I hate to even think about that one. Hope you guys are having a better time!

Oh Lord, its March!

Time is flying. Still nothing.


"A caterpillar
this deep in fall--
still not a butterfly"

--Basho


This pretty much sums up how I feel right now. I'm gonna come clean. I failed my accountancy papers I sat for last Dec. There, I said it. As usual, my mum's bugging me about my path again. That course means absolutely nothing to me. Its just an avenue to get migrated to Australia more easily, better job, higher pay, the whole nine yards. Thing is, I've tried the high power jobs, having high pay and a view from where I sit. Did I feel better then? Nope. I was pretty much braindead, everything in my head I used to have went to mush and stuff that got my interest was consumerism. The new bag, the Hello Kitty bazaar at the office block.... Yeap, I earned more, I spent more. I was still left in debt, waiting for my next paycheck. Plus, I had a job that was scarily black and white. They yelled at me when I tried to inject some colors in the Excel spreadsheet. Thinking of the prospect of bedoing this for the next couple of decades rock my socks....in a scary way, very scary. I need mind stimulation and creativity. I have ADHD and can't sit still for long. I wriggled in my seat far more times than DH's brother who watched Epic Movie with me today. I think they tried too hard; it wasn't funny anymore. Just sad. :P
Truth time? I do get jealous of high power executives every once in a while, clad in silk/wool suits, crisp white shirts, designer totes, patent leather shoes. But looking back at what I faced and what they are still facing makes me heave a sigh of relief. I suspect I was a hippie in my last life. I'm born to create and live life as a tree hugger. Ok, maybe not that sacrelicious, but I fear commitments. Having a job is like having a kid. No wait, a kid is worse. 24/7 for 18 years at least. Thats no kidding matter, pun intended. I'm thoroughly enjoying my extended adolescence, though I know that can't last for long. I leech too much on my parents even though I work very hard on my shop. I'm not complaining because I love what I do and thats priceless. To me. Still, I do get stuck. And people hounding for my blood makes it worse. sigh.

Cotton Friend and Cotton Time is my 2 best friends right now. I just wanna chill out so bad. DH was here the last 3 months and I never had enough sleep. Yes, I sleep too much, 9 hours, but I need that much to function. And 3 months of that was bad enough. I did appreciate DH being here though. Its hard not to miss his snores. Now its plain cold and quiet.

Ribbon swap on swapbot! I received my 1st package from swapbot ever! LOL Its a pack of real gorgeous ribbons from someone coz someone threw out the package, together with the name and address so.... yeah, it can be silly sometimes. I loved the ribbons though. Can't wait to use them! :+)

Next up! Lotus's birthday package. This girl is amazingly nice! She bought the tote from me for her own birthday so that I could have a flickr pro account. Its like 2 birds with one stone! So, since its for her birthday and she did something so nice for me, I decided to return by making her tote more fun - add loads of nice things! There was also a pencil set, sent to me by the lovely Christine but I'm not making use so I passed it on and a handmade birthday card. Hope she likes it! ^___^

Last but not least, before I have to rest my fingers (!!), my 1st summer tote! I made this in winter (eye roll) coz I couldn't resist the utterly adorable french fabric. I was contemplating keeping it but my bag collection can form mountains! Hope someone grabs it and help my horrible financial state. Here!

(I heard my dad say he wants me out soon.)

Its tradition for asian kids to live with their parents til they get married. hee

Ok, I have to go.