photo by jek.
Its Friday, another end of the week. Warning: Negativity ahead. I feel like running away again. When I was younger, november and december used to be the holiday period that everyone looks forward to, both from school and the Christmas. Now its all about wedding season. The stress from the weddings are stressing me out, and poor Charlene too. We both pray for it to be over soon. I want a peaceful christmas. Maybe I should put that on my list.
I was working thru some stockings today and it hit me again; what am I doing with my life? Is chasing money the only way to go? Everyone here seems to think so (i.e. - Singapore). They all ask me to get a REAL job. Often, people are judgmental about what I do. I really do not care about the money. I'm eating instant noodles everyday and haven't really bought clothing in a year. If I live for money, I'd be some brain-dead accountant by now, sitting in a 5 by 5 box, doing a job for a boss that couldn't care if I were dead or alive and would replace me in a heartbeat if I were found dead at my desk. Diagnosis? Overworking. I'd seriously rather be a hobo. I'm sick of being judged. Quit bugging me with the fact that you're swinging the latest Coach bag (or cell phone, gadget, shoes, whatever the f*** it is) in my face or that I should get married and have kids, that I shouldn't grow old alone. Maybe I want to. I said it before and I'll say it again to the juveniles, & open your freakin ears this time - I live my life the way I want to. If I fry, I'll die happy.
I think I was happier in Sydney. With good weather, less humidity, a lot more personal space, no crazy upstairs neighbors, and the possibilities of living an alternative lifestyle, than just being in the box all my life. Hmm.....I do dream of Cali days too....oh Jek, I do so wanna visit you someday!
p/s: Thanks so much for your comments! Its always to great to hear you guys! Forget choco ice-cream, encouraging words are so much better!